25 July 2009

being the second meme from the Queen

You are a guest on the space shuttle. You just arrived on the moon and realize you forgot something back home that you can't live without. What is it and how do you convince them to go back and fetch it?
My knitting! Alas, I can not convince anyone to go back for it because without nice, sharp needles, no one will respect my authorita. Not until we get back to earth, that is, because I will hunt each and every one of them and stab him until he has more dimples than a golf ball.

Pretend you are a teacher in a rough public school for one day. You have been assigned to teach Manners 101. You have the "challenging bad butt kids" class (remember this is a pretend school and anyway I can't say ass on my blog 'cause it's so unQueenly and I might get fined or something).
They are jumping up and down, cursing, and throwing things at you.
What is the first thing you would write on the board?
Don't hurt me.

Someone in your family or a friend has started a blog. They think it is anonymous but you have figured it out. They are saying derogatory things about you. Do you tell them or do you read it for awhile?
How would you handle it?
I would leave many comments. MANY, MANY comments. Limericks, even.

If you had one dollar left in your pocket, what would you spend it on?
A little packet of extra-strength Tylenol.

President Obama and the First Lady are coming over for dinner. What do you serve?
Lemonade and bread pudding. I'm sure they're sick of people who try to impress them with fancy food.

You walk in on your lover. They are trying on your clothes. What do you do?
Cry, because they look better in them than I do.

Every astronaut must have shots! Choose your vaccination: You only get one and you can't enjoy any of the attributes of the other choices. You choose either: (1) The fountain of eternal youth and sexual vigor but only for 10 years (2) perfect health for a lifetime (3) eternal mind-numbing nirvana and peace of mind (4) unlimited hedonism for one year with no negative consequences.
#2, because it would enable numbers 3 and 4. Mustn't be greedy and expect #1 as well.


Mimi Lenox said...

I think you might be right about the Obamas. The food sounds great to me!
"Don't hurt me"....would only make them want to hurt you. I think you need to change your strategy there.

I like the limerick idea on the anonymous blog. Very creative!
Thanks for playing.
You barely escaped the dungeon this week.


Kristi said...

I just dropped by to give you an award-


Rebecca :) said...

Funny answers! I am thinking of playing along with these as well. They are cute.

Remind me never to catch you without your knitting needles...

Donna Lee said...

I just wanted to tell you I love the Natural Peace poem. I emailed it to myself at work so I can put it up in front of me to remind me to put more peace into my day.

And I like the idea of writing Don't Hurt Me. I taught those kids for 3 years. Honesty and caring were what they responded to.

Allie said...

Limericks... Hrm... Good idea. Thanks for commenting on my blog! =)

jennifer said...

Ha! Don't hurt me... excellent answer!

And limmericks would be a good idea...

There once was a blogger from Vale
Who had rotten stories to tell
I had some wine and dropped them a line
And told them to just go to....



Daphne said...

I would clap and prance and be very happy if I caught a lover trying on my clothes, because, boy or girl, I think it's funny and adorable for someone to be wearing your clothes. Yes, *any* clothes. Including *those* clothes.